Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Randomize
