Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
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