You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
