Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
and she was petting her beer can
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Randomize
