she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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