oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Farmville is her only friend.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Randomize
