How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Can I just say I love that you have a kegorator on your wedding registry?
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Uber driver has left leg up on the dash and turn signal on for about a mile, there's Chipotle wrappers on the floor, but she's hot. 5 stars.
Randomize
