Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
only if we run a train.
done.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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