he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
