Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
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