Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Just found out my mom's voicemail password is 6969..
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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