i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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