Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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