So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
