White coat. Heels.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize