the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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