If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
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