I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Randomize
