Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I'm getting married
To pizza
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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