how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
