Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
