believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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