all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
