90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
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