i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
