my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Randomize
