I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
