We're like a lot better than the average bears
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
i came on her dog
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
