I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Randomize