Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
Terrible idea I love it
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Randomize
