Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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