Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Randomize
