I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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