he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
We're using joints as your birthday candles
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
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