three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Not gonna lie, Wednesday was the perfect day to get laid off, all I've done since is watch the Simpsons marathon
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
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