He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
