mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Randomize
