please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
