I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
