I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
