gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
He called me at 4 a.m. and wanted me to drive him to McDonald's then drop him off at home. It wasn't even a booty call, it was a fucking chauffeur call.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
