real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
