addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
I cockslap morals
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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