I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
I stole a fireplace last night.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
