I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
Are we still banned from the library?
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
Randomize
