so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
