you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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