that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
