Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize