Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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